Why adultery (emotional or physical) makes no sense. Some events of the past few months made me think about a couple that was once close to my family. This family fell apart, both husband and wife committed adultery. This then made me think about why adultery makes no sense.

First off I want to define adultery as a bit more then one where you sleep around. Jesus defined even lust as adultery. But I just want to define it as making a connection (either emotionally or sexually) with another person, especially one where you wouldnt feel comfortable with your spouse looking on. Ive had several girl friends over the years, and this was always the test I would use. If I felt ashamed involving my wife in the friendship then it isnt healthy.

But onto my main topic, why adultery makes no sense:

1. Your view of the other person is not complete.
You dont really know the other person, and they dont know you. You have an ideal picture of that person. Where as your spouse you have a whole picture. You know their negatives very well. The negatives tend to overshadow the positives because they hurt so much.

2. If they would cheat with you, they would cheat on you.
Think about it, they have already shown that a vow of marriage or a relationship has little value to them. So what happens when their view of you becomes more complete, and they start seeing your negatives over your positives? They will find somebody else, and move on. Then at this point, you are without your first relationship and without your second one. And you probably lost a lot of friends along the way who were disgusted by your behavior.

So what is the solution? Work on your current relationship. If you have already gone down this path, confess it. The truth is that most spouses will forgive adultery the first time around (and many times after that really). But a relationship built on a lie isnt worth having anyways. Plus the other person probably knows they didnt help the situation. Everybody in a relationship generally has some part in a broken relationship. If you havent gone down this path, then do whatever it takes to turn your relationship around.

Ive seen the devastating effects of divorce on families. Ive seen the children have their lives turned upside down.